As things keep evolving with the Covid-19 pandemic, I have been worrying about my EFC family and my network back in Durham. I'm receiving email after email about events being canceled, options for how to reduce risk by replacing actual interactions with virtual ones, and revised plans that attempt to flatten the curve--slowing the expansion of the infected population in the short run so that we can build up our capacity to respond. The bottom line, flattening the curve will reduce deaths and keep vulnerable people safe.
But the constant flux, the number of unknowns, the changes in routine all take a toll. The background level of stress everyone is dealing with is higher than normal. When our brains are working overtime trying to assimilate to how to keep us safe in the changing circumstances, they have less bandwidth for other things. As a result, it's easier to be triggered into a fight, flight or freeze response that under normal circumstances we could cope with. And our survival brains can stay in charge because the stress is unrelenting - leaving us highly reactive or in a frozen, numb zone - if we don't take steps to remind ourselves we are not currently in active danger. Everyone's tool kit for bringing themselves back into their resilience zone (that place where they are no longer just focused on survival) looks different. But whether it's deep breathing or taking a walk or playing a game, it's important to find time to bring us back into our functional zone so we can use our whole brain to navigate the constantly changing environment.
It's intense for those who suddenly have children home from school for three weeks. Parents are managing their own stress and at the same time working to keep their little people from feeling stir-crazy while honoring the intent of the closure -- keeping away from others so the virus can't spread. Many of the typical ways to occupy children (playgrounds, museums, libraries, play dates) now become something to reassess. For families with more limited resources - living in smaller spaces, without transportation, without enough food on hand, without toys or books or technology to engage their children - social distancing becomes even more challenging. Figuring out how to support families --both generations-- during life’s difficult moments is what I think the staff at EFC is really good at. I know the staff will be there for each other and the families EFC supports during these difficult times.
The New Zealand response has been to cancel large events, turn away cruise ships, and ask everyone coming into New Zealand from anywhere else to self-isolate for two weeks. My one worry is that when I'm ready to come home, either New Zealand will no longer fly to the United States or the United States will no longer be accepting airplanes from abroad. When these thoughts start to intrude too often, I take a walk around my office or take a little break to play a game. I hope that whatever unfolds in the next few weeks, you are surrounded by support and have some tools in your toolkit that help you function as best you can with the stress of COVID-19 running in the background.